|'Tis The Season for Drinking.
||[Dec. 23rd, 2003|11:30 pm]
After an all-day slumber, I woke up and realized I still had no money.|
Shrugging that aside, I answered some emails, tooled on some web pages, and I found some gift ideas. Gift ideas with no money are the anxiety. That quashed down well when my mother encouraged me to go get the things I wanted to give.
I remember this time of year this last year. Miserable in a dead-end job that worsened by day, somehow it was a little different because if I wanted to go out and get something, I had the money to do it. Everyone got gifts last year out of my pocket, which is something I've rarely ever had the opportunity to do.
'Twas a good feeling then, and once again, I went out to get the last minute gifts this year. I did a little work to find something for Heidi that she'd love. I did buy my mom something that she actually requested.
Never have I understood the reason for surprising people with gifts. I know Heidi, so it's easy to give her something. Once I choke down the anxiety of spending money I do not have, and the name is on the receipt, then I can feel good about this until the bill with the due date for minimum payment arrives.
Mom's comfort and reassurance helped. I went out to own some more socks at Meijer's, and I also bought a decent Francis Coppola black label Claret, a Cabernet Sauvingnon, 2001, on sale by like 35% for the holidays. Yes, Coppola has wine. Now you know.
I can relax. Sorting through more of my stuff tonight will be easier, since I'm over the mad anxiety that this holiday brings for me.