|Shots . . .
||[Jul. 19th, 2003|03:14 am]
|[||In the Moment
|||||Silence of Mr. Computer's Lifelike Hum.||]|
To Mr. Takashima and Mr. Moreno, for keepin' it real in the House of the Dead.
I know you guys would quit if you liked doing absolutely nothing, but going everywhere with your thoughts. Yes, Carlos, I'm actually 'doing something' . . . I didn't spend hundreds to get a life insurance license to do nothing . . . that's something. I'm still a life insurance agent, and I have a bad back, low energy, and a new look on life . . . life is just way too odd to comment in one nice lil' simple package.
When you forcefed yourself the indignity of taking orders from people who are probably 65% as intelligent as yourself . . . Oh, they know how to play the Game though, yes they do. They play so well. They don't even know what they're doing. They're too scared to know much outside their reality, inside the company walls, which is all that matters in that world.
Scary! Don't get sucked in there! It'll take your passion. Is your passion dead yet?
Oh, and one last reason why I didn't 'gel' . . . even though I'm a shy and caring person at heart, I'm a risk taker, and I'm filled with fire of life.
When I think of that time there, I feel so cheap.
2003-07-19 05:24 am (UTC)
And just to show you all, I'm not crazy.
Though, I'll betcha that if I was taking this in earlier years, I'd be off the charts. They woulda locked me in a cell and shocked my skull until I just drooled and looked stupid like Jack's character in One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest.
"Oooh, look at him. He's in rare form."
Although, it said nothing about my insomnia. Dammit I just can't sleep. I'm so pissed about this.
Schizotypal - Mild Schizz.
Many believe that schizotypal personality disorder represents mild schizophrenia. The disorder is characterized by odd forms of thinking and perceiving, and individuals with this disorder often seek isolation from others. They sometimes believe to have extra sensory ability or that unrelated events relate to them in some important way. They generally engage in eccentric behavior and have difficulty concentrating for long periods of time. Their speech is often over elaborate and difficult to follow.
I never said anything about it all relating to me. I'm not that important.
No, I don't have any problem staring at this afdjklsfsadkl;fasjdkflasj screen for hours and hours and hours because I'd like to sleep but I can't because when I lay down, I'm not tired, and when I'm sitting here, I'm almost falling asleep. Go figure. This will be what drives me nuts.
I think this moderate rating is due to my answers of odd thinking and perceiving. I do like the company of no one else, but I don't mind if people are here, just that they don't ruin my mojo. I sure have some odd behaviors, like a baseball signed twice by Detroit Tiger circa 1968, Willie Horton, because he wasn't paying attention while talking to someone not me, the brilliant fool. Plus, no one understands what the hell I babble about but me. Heidi thinks she knows sometimes, but no I don't expect everyone to really understand or care about every last time I write "the" on this thing.
2003-07-19 06:07 am (UTC)
Re: Though, I do speak about voices a lot.
The Willie Horton double-signed baseball.
That son of a bitch.
I go through the trouble of collecting autographs of certain baseball stars, and he shits it up in a momentary lapse of concentration.
I have my odd behaviors, but I listen to you sons of bitches. Show some goddamn respect! lol . . .
2003-07-19 05:53 am (UTC)
Mr. Moreno, Mr. Takashima . . .
Maybe you're still reading.
Anyway, this is the conversation I would have interjected, though not quite as articulate, verbally, had we more time to chat. And Carlos, don't wimp out on me with your fancy new plans and your shiny Vibe. I desparately want to go back to Mexican town, but it's no fun going new places except to look for ghosts and maybe do something insanely spontaneous when I'm by myself.
You should take advice from the Advice Bunny.http://www.4degreez.com/misc/advice_index.html
I wanted management. Come on, I graduated with a 3.6 in BSBA in 3.5 years dammit. I should have known that when members of management didn't have college degrees, and half the company didn't have one probably, that no one gave a shit how smart I was . . . shit, I aim so low in life.
Advice Bunny is right.
You should take his advice.http://www.4degreez.com/misc/advice_index.html
Now my loyal subjects, find a way to get the director fired, and bring me a copy of her termination letter.
2003-07-24 01:53 pm (UTC)
Wow, what a huge jerk I am!
I never realized that sometimes I can be a bit much.
I want to vomit on my shoes, but I'm wearing sandals, and they have deep patterns in the sole to the point where it would be a mess to clean up, and I'm lazy and stupid.
I'll just carry this shame with me for the day.
And, to all parties involved, I'm so sorry for all of us.