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Texas Wins the NCAA National Football Championship. - Sauce1977 — LiveJournal [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]

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Texas Wins the NCAA National Football Championship. [Jan. 5th, 2006|05:00 pm]
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[In the Moment |Amazing]

It was Condoms vs. Steers . . . and the steers knew no contraception.

Congratulations to the Texas Longhorns. They are the new national champions of NCAA Football.

The game finished out to be 41-38. The big-time winner? Vince Young.

I watched a story about a childhood accident that Young had. It was serious enough to leave a big scar on his pot-belly. Vince, however, was made stronger from that serious injury. He possessed, on that Wednesday night, the most stone-cold of all performances on that field. In a place where he shouldn't have been that focused, calm, and precise, he showed the world just how tough he was. He pulled out a major win for a team that received half of the credit that USC had been given.

Both teams deserved to be in this championship contest.

2005 USC's offense, from this moment, will be considered one of the greatest juggernauts in history. Texas's defense couldn't hold USC to anything less than 38 points. Despite the national media and their reports of Leinart's "great" game, it was anything but a sliver of the power he displayed in previous contests. On top of this fact, Leinart pulled a Freudian in the on-field post-game interview. To the effect of being asked how he felt in the outcome, he slipped up with half of the word "win," then corrected himself with "loss," and then added a "whatever" in the mush of words.

I'm sorry to report that Matt Leinart probably should have paid more attention on Wednesday. From this moment, he entertains a serious question of which Matt Leinart shows up on any given Sunday. That's a shitty thing for him to have to answer, but if he hadn't featured delay of game penalties, near-interceptions which would have been, if it wasn't for Texas defenders having hooves for hands, and the mind-numbingly stupid roll-out with 8 seconds left in the game, only to throw the ball away 1 second too late, then maybe he wouldn't be sitting somewhere right now, wondering just what the hell happened last night.

Reggie Bush? He was too exuberant. Mistakes like the impromptu lateral/fumble early in the game won't escape him in the pros without a mountain of criticism and zero love. His amateur status, like Leinart's, ended yesterday. No more will they be glossed over by an adoring media with trivial errors. They will be fundamental mistakes in the NFL. That shit won't fly, especially 60 percent of the leaps and other nonsense that Reggie pulled in that game.

This game was all Vince. He was the most noticeable guy of the three who played like a total pro. Dwayne Jarrett on USC made a nice touchdown, late-game, and there were other solid moments, but in this excellent battle, there was a ton of sloppy play. The sloppies featured on defense . . . big-time . . . from both defenses. Despite all of this nonsense, the 2nd half of that game proved to be a flamethrower of awesome.

Oh, and you win this round, Matthew McConaughey . . .

Matthew McConaughey

However . . .

To quote your character, Wooderson, from Dazed and Confused . . .

That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.

Hey Wooderson, do yourself a favor. Stop raiding the panties out the sorority. Go out and do some more great roles in film. Get the fuck out of the team picture.

Oh, and LSU fans and fans of schools in the SEC . . .

I am sorry, but from now on, you have to prove to me that you're not stupid.

Thanks for outing all your inferior genes up in here.


From: hulagalinthesky
2006-01-05 10:40 pm (UTC)
Matthew M. is pretty cute.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2006-01-05 10:46 pm (UTC)
That he is.

Along with the entire Longhorn Nation, I wish he'd stop using that ridiculous metal-fingers gesture. I mean, shit, throw up some gang signs or something. Anything but stealing from metal.

When I think of metal, I don't think of Texas, ever.
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From: hulagalinthesky
2006-01-05 10:48 pm (UTC)
I hear you.
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[User Picture]From: ellie
2006-01-05 10:41 pm (UTC)
I think my concern about Matt Leinart is that he's readily admitted on ESPN that he suffers from anxiety and depression and can't take the stress of being a hero on campus. He's reported that he's had to speak to head shrinkers and the like.

Of course, I just saw this as an interview, got no written word to back it up. Here's hoping the the Jets do *not* go for Leinart.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2006-01-05 10:44 pm (UTC)
Unfortunately, I think Leinart's the best man for the Jets job.

His arm, no matter what he feels, is better than Chad's.

Gotta cut the small-school chaff. Time for big-school wheat.

Leinart isn't the wisest man, however . . . hanging out with Nick Lachey when he could have selected from thousands of other more-awesome people . . . please, Matt. Divest of that corndog, immediately.
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[User Picture]From: ellie
2006-01-05 10:49 pm (UTC)
And the funny thing is, the Jets supposedly want him... It could be an interesting draft day, definately.

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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2006-01-05 11:18 pm (UTC)
I can't find anything under "Leinart depression," but I found an eye-opener on what happens to these teams of people after their glory days are through.

I watched USC beat Michigan back in the 1990 Rose Bowl on New Year's Day.

One needs a free registration to the LA Times to read it, but it's an eye-opener.

Noteables from that squad in the NFL today . . . Jonnnie Morton, Junior Seau.

Many others went in the most diverse of directions.
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[User Picture]From: pjwilliams
2006-01-06 01:10 am (UTC)
Eh, he hasn't had a great role since Wooderson.....which he seems to be playing in his real life now.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2006-01-06 02:25 am (UTC)
It's kinda funny, but the most angry people out of all this are stupid motherfucking LSU fans.

I love it.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2006-01-06 03:45 am (UTC)
Did you ever see Frailty? I kinda liked that one.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2006-01-06 03:17 am (UTC)

I thought of you when I went on my LSU = my enemy parade

I know you can separate the bullshit from the nitty-gritty.

It was a great festival of stupid in wake of Texas's win. I felt like I was watching the aftermath of the WS championship of the Boston Red Sox.

A 3-point victory for Texas equaled in response on k0rdell's gig to be 80 points in the eyes of everyone who hated the shit out of USC.

I loved it, since they all outed themselves.
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[User Picture]From: anthrogeek
2006-01-07 11:58 pm (UTC)
wooderson and that picture made me laugh.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2006-01-09 02:34 am (UTC)
Matt's a funny actor, and he's sometimes most high-larious when he's not acting.
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