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I Quit Smoking for 5 Hours! - Sauce1977 [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Sauce1977

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I Quit Smoking for 5 Hours! [Feb. 24th, 2004|03:54 pm]
Sauce1977
[In the Moment |surprisedsurprised]
[Special Music |Nirvana - Scentless Apprentice]

Thank you, acid_burn_007! You inspired me to write a bit today.

The original post, "On Ethics #1 - Time" can be found here.

It's sometimes a choice to mute one's life.

acid_burn_007 wrote on Feb 15, 2004,

On ethics #1-TIME


I wasted the last three hours of my life playing the Sims and sleeping. Why? Because I'm sick of all this "portable" shit. I know people always say that our lives are too rushed, but you don't really notice until you catch yourself in it. I noticed it so much at work today. First off, for lunch, come on, I'm sitting on my MOBILE phone (so I don't have to sit at home to talk) with SOUP AT HAND as my lunch. Fuck corporations and their making everything so damn "convenient." I think they're trying to force us all into mental illness. That's probably a big part of my problems in life. After eating my portable lunch, one of my clients and I went to Wal-Mart to buy his girlfriend an engagement ring. This was a very big step for him, and it took him awhile to check out the different rings. I was enjoying how long the process took, and was envious in a sort of way that my clients can live more simply. They don't have cell phones or pagers, or have to schedule their boyfriends in, like I pretty much do. But I was happy with my client then knowing how excited he was, and smiled every time he asked: "Nicolette, is this one good?" "Will she like this ring?" "It's three dollars and ninety-nine cents? ("no, ____, it's three HUNDRED and ninety-nine dollars)" and so on. It took about a half an hour, and I wanted to punch the people on the other side of the counter that were tapping their fingers on the counter and letting out exasperated sighs. Maybe that would enlighten them. But, because I am a logical person, I abstained, of course. We only live once (ok, several times for the pagans/hindus reading this, but still...). Why rush it?



Very good observations, acid_burn_007, and I agree. I've been there before, and repeatedly, with that feeling . . . with the exception of being addressed as Nicolette.

Sometimes I feel like I need to shut out the urges to multi-task.

At 6:30 AM, after listening to the crazy upstairs neighbors thump around for 4 hours, my last smoke went up in flames.

I said to myself, "I'm tired now, and I hate this chemical crutch."

So I went to sleep, and I made an effort to sleep as long as possible in order to keep from the eventual crazy feelings and senses that come with going for more than a couple hours without nicotine.

My body woke me up right before noon, howling on the inside.

"Chris, this is your monkey. FEED THE GODDAMN MONKEY!!! What is wrong with you? Are you crazy? Smell that? Yeah, you can smell. Yeah, that's what the Los Angeles air smells like! You didn't know because you were keeping me fed. But know this: You need to feed . . . the MONKEY!!!"

He wasn't always an evil monkey.


After the internal episode, I washed up. I debated the feelings for another 15 minutes on the walk to the store. I kind of missed and did not want those feelings at the same time. Knowing what something smells like, to have the sense so crisp, especially with regards to catching a whiff of fresh dog poo, it disturbs and surprises, all at once.

So, 5 hours of quitting, oh well. The monkey is a vicious and crude negotiator.

I'll beat it yet.

I guess my point is . . . some people are so afraid, gripped by fear, that they cannot deal with the sheer idle time on their hands, so much to the point that like me, they nose themselves into a stupor . . . only multi-tasking is the addictive source, where as I choose to input a chemical with by-products that could cause cancer and take away my short-term crisp senses.

The writing inspired me to listen to one of my favorite albums of all time, Nirvana's In Utero.

Again, thank you kingly, acid_burn_007.





Smoke up, Johnny.


Quick Note: I look forward to Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.
linkReply

Comments:
[User Picture]From: freys
2004-02-24 05:21 pm (UTC)
You know what? Y'all need a vacation. It sucks that nearly most people can't afford them, though, when some sort of break from all the shit that keeps piling up just after you've sorted the previous pile out is necessary to stay sane. Eugh.

And I'm looking to that movie as well. I knew about it like last year, actually, since for a period of time I've been watching Elijah Wood's life. :D
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2004-02-24 05:43 pm (UTC)
Spotless Mind promises much, we'll see how it delivers.

I did take a vacation! No wait, I moved to Los Angeles. This isn't a vacation, shit . . .
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2004-02-24 06:58 pm (UTC)
It's a whole lot of buildup toward the release of this film. It would be a shame for it to be less than its growing hype.
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[User Picture]From: fruitpunch76
2004-02-25 05:58 am (UTC)

Yay

Well my love, as I said earlier. It was a step.

Thank you for last night, by the way. It helped out A LOT!!!

wink, wink

Well depending on how you look at it...maybe you are on vacation. You are not working, so it could be considered a vay-cay.
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[User Picture]From: elias
2004-02-25 01:13 pm (UTC)
That damn monkey.

Even after 3 days of starving him, I always end up feeding the little bastard.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2004-02-25 01:16 pm (UTC)
He grips you, not physically, but internally!

If you don't have it, everything is so Patrick Suskind!
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[User Picture]From: elias
2004-02-26 07:50 am (UTC)
Patrick Suskind?
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2004-02-26 11:28 am (UTC)
Allow me to fill in the details.

Since I haven't read the book itself, you'll have to forgive me.

Nirvana did a song called "Scentless Apprentice." In the explanations of his songs, Cobain mentioned that that song in particular was inspired from a read of Patrick's novel, Perfume.

http://www.silverbox.com/nirvana/inutero.html (Nirvana lyrics, listing of "Scentless Apprentice")

http://www.bbc.co.uk/arts/books/author/suskind/ (listing of Patrick Suskind the novelist and his important works).

Apparently, the book is about a guy who is driven mad by senses, of which his senses are more crisp than most.

Good stuff, and it has been on my to-do list for quite some time.

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[User Picture]From: elias
2004-02-27 04:03 am (UTC)
Well that sheds a little light, I never could figure out what that song was about.

Have to check out the book.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2004-02-27 11:13 am (UTC)
You're not in the minority.

Having listened to the music tracks thousands of times, I've become accustomed to the Cobain Yarble.

Think Cat in Pain and Heat.

Weird Al Yankovic's song parody, "Smells Like Nirvana," became a hit exactly because of the need for subtitles sometimes.
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[User Picture]From: elias
2004-02-27 11:24 am (UTC)
I could understand the words pretty well but they didn't seem to be more than rants. I think that most (if not all) of Nirvana's songs have interesting stories behind them.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2004-02-27 11:33 am (UTC)
Big time, the initial response is, "Why in blazes did they put a microphone to his face! He's being tortured! That's just ssssick!"

The significance in the songs are scattered from many sources. I liked how he mixed personal significance with the general.

"Just because you're paranoid . . .

don't mean they're not after youuuu."
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[User Picture]From: elias
2004-03-02 07:17 am (UTC)
"Just because you're paranoid . . .
don't mean they're not after youuuu."


Words to live by.

This is very close to William Burroughs saying "If you aren't at least a little paranoid these days, there is something wrong with you."
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2004-03-02 07:40 am (UTC)
Oddly enough, before the two departed from our existence, Cobain and Burroughs met.

They traded gifts, and there was a collaboration . . . a spoken-word Burroughs ditty "The Priest They Called Him."

I'm not sure where to find it, but it is Burroughs with the words, and Cobain with the noise guitar.
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[User Picture]From: elias
2004-03-02 07:43 am (UTC)
I think I grabbed that from KaZaa before the RIAA militia started going after children and senoir citizens for downloading.

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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2004-03-02 08:29 am (UTC)
Is it any good, if you have it?
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[User Picture]From: elias
2004-03-03 07:40 am (UTC)
I don't remember.
When I find it, I'll see about getting you a copy if you'd like.
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[User Picture]From: sauce1977
2004-03-04 04:17 am (UTC)
That would be super-duper!

Sorry about the geekiness showing through.
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[User Picture]From: elias
2004-03-08 10:51 am (UTC)
:D
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